Dad died exactly eight years ago today. I feel like many others who have lost people they love: how can it have been so long, we wonder? The day before dad died he rode his exercise bike and I had just tried to install a window portable air conditioner for my parents' apartment that didn't … Continue reading Eight years
dying
I love you bigger than the sky
I've had a hard time knowing what to do with the shock and grief I've felt in response to the recent school shooting. Yes, we must demand gun control. Yes, we can hold those we love dear and send prayers and support to the affected families and community. Other writer friends have expressed that they … Continue reading I love you bigger than the sky
Death, taxes and blossoming cherry trees
When I awoke yesterday I tried to decipher why I was so tired. An April first joke? Gratefully I had the opportunity to spend last weekend at our beloved Illahee with my bestie-for-forever friend, and I had even taken two days of vacation from work. I am fortunate and grateful. Yet as I awakened Friday … Continue reading Death, taxes and blossoming cherry trees
Of wallpaper and memories
I am a visual learner, meaning also that my mind sometimes wanders during verbal activities. Especially if something catches my eye or attention. I think about this occasionally in the context of my own aging. Age-related macular degeneration lies heavily in my gene pool: I walked with my mom in her final years, a decade … Continue reading Of wallpaper and memories
Sixty, American Pie and the dental drill
Today I turned sixty. Yes, sometimes my writing reads like a stream of consciousness. More recently, maybe less so. Today, I am certain, probably more so. Sixty. Sixty years ago, as Mom's nurse or doctor at Portland’s Good Samaritan Hospital told her “not yet,” she and Dad crossed Northwest 23rd Avenue to Quality Pie Shop. … Continue reading Sixty, American Pie and the dental drill
From lupus to dementia: the art of healing and acceptance
No, this isn't really about COVID. Although, having a loved one acquire breakthrough COVID, after already having it once, does have me wondering more about disease predisposition. In all the controversies of today, some believe positivity keeps all evils away: even COVID-19. What I know, is that it doesn't. For after all, whether a disease … Continue reading From lupus to dementia: the art of healing and acceptance
Moving on: out beyond
Today marks one week since our mom's Celebration of Life. It was beautiful, authentic and shared by almost seventy people who loved her dearly. As with dad, though perhaps for different reasons, this event was scheduled months after she died. And though everyone makes often personal decisions on whether or not or how to hold … Continue reading Moving on: out beyond
It must be said
I woke up this morning knowing I must write about this. Usually I feel the rush of words dictating my next blog at other times: during a walk, as I cycle to work, even while reading a book. Not this time. This is tough to write, a topic some may say best for intimate conversations. … Continue reading It must be said
The anniversary emotional rollercoaster
So many different anniversaries we note in these human lives we lead. We anticipate them, celebrate some and mourn others. We memorialize significant historical and celebratory events, the bad and good: D.Day, 9/11, the first pandemic lock down, the 1977 Blazer NBA win, February 14, 1859 Statehood. Some anniversaries remind us of accomplishments: we reminisce … Continue reading The anniversary emotional rollercoaster
Sorrow, renewal and little altars
Earlier this week my friend asked me if she could share something she had been wanting to mention, but wasn't sure I was ready to hear. Yes, I replied. I'm game. I'm good. She reminded me that as part of the loss I have experienced recently, I have lost being anyone's daughter. Anyone on earth, … Continue reading Sorrow, renewal and little altars
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